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  Wild Irish

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  ALL OF ME

  ALL OF ME SERIES BOOK ONE

  BY VI CARTER

  Other Books by Vi Carter

  A Broken Heart Series

  Saving Grace

  Claiming Amber

  Taking Laura

  All of Me Series

  All of Me

  Wild Irish

  Wild Irish

  PROLOGUE

  The cold slates that penetrated the back of her white dress didn’t take the scorching heat away from her face.

  Bert’s hand rose again but stopped in mid-air, every finger straight, to the point of straining. Her eyes shot from his hand to his red face–flushed with anger and alcohol. The front door behind him, a white beacon, seemed to grow smaller the longer she lay there. She focused on the spiels of the stairs, where some of the white paint had been chipped off from all the children that passed through the doors of Bert and Ronnie’s foster home. Each breath she took hurt as she forced the air into her lungs.

  “I asked you a question!” his voice wasn’t slurred or fueled with the anger that was clearly displayed on his sixty-year-old face. His words were a command, a promise that wasn’t idle. Layla made a mistake earlier when he had asked her where his keys were and she didn’t answer. Fear had kept her voice buried deep inside her.

  But now she knew she needed to answer. Her small body shook as she tried to sink further into the stone floor that she lay on, her attention now on Bert. “I don’t know,” she said while bracing herself for the next slap that he planted on her face without hesitation. This one was harder than the last and sent her head snapping back. Blood filled her mouth, and stars filled her head. It took her a few seconds before her hearing returned, and her hands went to her aching face on reflex.

  Bert leaned over her, stumbling slightly. If he fell on her, she would smother, from the sheer size of him. He unknowingly stopped himself from falling on top of her.

  “You think you’re clever?” He snarled. Her red, hot face hurt too much, and she made a tiny move back hoping he wouldn’t see it. It was a small one, but he did notice.

  Oh, no, no, no…

  Her slender shoulders tightened as he reached for her. His large hand raced out, encasing her tiny wrist with pressure that threatened to her crush bones. A scream tore from her throat at the same time the door opened.

  He was taller and broader than her, and she would know him anywhere. With his black hood up, she couldn’t see his features, but she knew his eyes would be tightened around the edges.

  Her body sagged with relief, knowing that everything would be okay now. He was only nine months older than her ten years. But to her, he was so much bigger, and he always made Bert stop. Bert was focused on the door now and was no longer touching her.

  “Get away from her.” He spoke each word through heavy breaths. Bert turned to him now, and Jared’s body stiffened. A new fear entered her body, dripping slowly down her spine, a fear for Jared. What if he got hurt this time? The thought of Jared getting hurt pulled a whimper from her lips.

  “It’s okay Layla,” Jared’s reassurance was said as he stared at Bert. All she could do was nod at him.

  “It’s okay Layla,” Bert mimicked and sneered as he lingered for what felt like forever but was only a moment. Then he gave her one final look before leaving her and Jared alone in the breezy hallway. Jared walked to her slowly before pushing back his hood, his brown eyes soft. He squeezed her hand. “It’s okay, Layla. I’m home.” The hug he gave her, felt and smelt like home. Even with the blare of the TV and constant threat of Bert’s anger. Right now, she was safe. She was home.

  CHAPTER ONE

  So much could change in a moment, a lot can change in five years. Five years. That’s how long it’s been since I’ve seen Jared. Five years to the day, when I was dragged from his arms kicking and screaming. He fought so hard, with his thirteen-year-old fists. His curse words were worse than Bert’s when he was drunk.

  The sound of the sliding door opening pulled me away from my thoughts. The swing bench creaked as Evelyn sat down. She had deep olive-tone skin and dark wavy hair. She was stunning and took care of herself. The smell of her moisturizer on her arms consumed me. Glancing up from my hands I found her watching me. “You don’t have to do this.”

  My heart skipped a beat with how much I wanted to walk away from this, but I couldn’t. I couldn’t walk away, because I had to do this for all those children. For Jared and me. But mostly it was my chance to see him. I was both nervous and excited at the prospect of seeing him. Would I recognize him after five years? Would he recognize me? Would he even be there? Was he okay?

  “Close your eyes and take a breath.” As I did what Evelyn instructed, an empty feeling opened up in the pit of my stomach. I wanted to puke.

  “Tell me what you’re thinking?” Evelyn spoke in her calming voice. She was a counselor. Some would say I was lucky to have been adopted by her and Carl, but her voice of reason wasn’t always welcomed. Right now, though, I needed her.

  “Jared.” His name caused Evelyn to stiffen beside me. Her reaction to him always confused me. She made me feel as if Jared was the one who hurt me when he was the one who protected me. I dropped my hands to my lap before opening my eyes. “I wonder if he’ll remember me?” Evelyn took my hand in hers. “Of course, he will. How could he forget you?” she brushed a loose strand of blonde hair behind my ear. I wanted to ask her why she didn’t like me talking about Jared. But I didn’t get the chance.

  Carl had stepped out into the back garden, a steaming hot mug of coffee in his hands. His soft green eyes and olive skin made him attractive, even for his fifty years. He, too, kept himself in shape. “It’s time to go,” he indicated by showing us his watch. I couldn’t read it from this distance, but I nodded and hopped up from the bench. Evelyn stood behind me now, placing both her hands on my shoulders. The slight squeeze filled me with the strength I needed. I inhaled a deep breath and swallowed. “I’m ready,” I told Carl who smiled at me.

  I had spent five years in therapy, trying to erase every slap and thumb, every word and memory and now I had to tell everyone what I had suffered at Bert and Ronnie’s hands. I had to tell them and prove to Carl and Evelyn that they had saved me. That they had fixed me.

  I gathered my phone and bag before hurrying to the car before I changed my mind. The click of the car being unlocked had me climbing into the back. Evelyn and Carl both got in and glanced at each other. It was a split second but one I saw and one that had me sinking into the car seat. They didn’t think I was strong enough.

  “I’m ready,” I said once again even as my throat threatened to close. Pulling down the visor Evelyn glanced at me with a soft smile that crinkled the skin around her brown eyes. “We know you are, sweetheart.”

  Carl started the car and reversed out of the drive. My gaze drifted away from Evelyn’s and to the yards of houses we passed, all neat. Each house was as white and each one as perfect as the next. It was a far cry from where I had come. Bert’s house had been unkempt and dilapidated, a bit like its occupants.

  “If, and I’m only saying if, you change your mind, Layla, we can always turn back.” It was Carl who spoke. The softness and kindness in his voice still sometimes startled me. Even after five years of witnessing what a great man he was, I couldn’t erase the other twelve. ‘The Before’ is h
ow I liked to view it. A different time and life, one that I dipped into for a reference but never stayed there. Now I would have to go back. I clutched my purse as my stomach churned. “Thanks, Carl, but I want to do this.”

  Carl gazed at me in the rear-view mirror; I caught my own reflection and looked away. My white skin was ghostly; I looked like someone who was going to puke their guts up. My blue eyes were full and watery looking.

  Another glance was shared between Carl and Evelyn, one that I pretended I didn’t see as I clutched my bag tighter. They were such good people, and I was the first foster child they had ever taken in, not being able to have children themselves. I often wondered why people who deserved to have children couldn’t, and ones who shouldn’t be allowed to have children, could. Was it God’s plan or was it just a flaw in the body? To me, it was such a shame. Both of them were amazing.

  The drive to the courthouse felt like it was taking forever. I had made this journey countless times in the car that Carl and Evelyn had purchased me for my seventeenth birthday only two weeks ago. The red starlet had been a lavish gift, but one they both said was nothing. It wasn’t new, but to me, it was perfect. With the summer and my new job both starting, it would get me to work so I wouldn’t have to rely on Carl or Evelyn to take me.

  “I was thinking afterward we could stop and pick up some Chinese. I know it’s your favorite.” I tensed as the large red brick building came into view. My stomach twisted as I glanced up at the seven-story structure.

  “Yeah, that would be great.” I swallowed the enormous lump in my throat as we pulled into the parking lot. Food was the furthest thing from my mind right now.

  Carl turned off the car, and I quickly took the bottle of water out of my bag. Taking a nervous gulp, I replaced the blue lid. Stop delaying. You can do this.

  Repeating this in my head gave me the strength to climb out of the car. Once everyone stood on the sidewalk, Carl locked the car. My heart pounded, and the thumping felt painful against my chest. Evelyn’s warmth enveloped me as she pulled me into a hug. For a moment I stayed there, in the safety of her arms. I let my mind settle and focused on her smell. But I couldn’t stay here forever.

  You can do this.

  Telling myself this once again allowed me to step out of Evelyn’s embrace. The eyes of many people glanced at me, and one or two lingered, but I focused on the two most important people in the world to me.

  My hands tightened on my purse strap as I focused on Carl’s words. “I’m going to be real honest with you,” I nodded at Carl’s words, “I don’t want you to do this.” My gaze dipped at Carl’s words, as my heart felt like it was shrinking.

  “But we both know you are strong enough to do this,” Evelyn’s words wrestled a smile out of me, as I looked from her to Carl.

  “You are,” Carl smiled back and we all started walking again towards the gloomy building. As I looked up, I had to force my legs to keep moving. But Evelyn’s and Carl’s belief in me made me walk across the vast open space that acted as a lobby and waiting room. Chairs were placed all along the wall; people sat waiting. Some looked dressed more for a casual meeting then for court. My eyes collided with a girl who didn’t smile at me. Her high blonde ponytail was something that I could never achieve with my hair. It was too fine to stay in place, and strands would come loose, giving me the appearance of someone who either had just gotten out of bed or fallen asleep on a couch or train or something. Today I wore my hair down. It always sat neatly down my back, so it was appropriate for court. The girl turned her attention to a kid who sat a few seats away playing with a small red car.

  The air in the lobby was heavy and warm, and I found myself pulling at the blouse that Evelyn had laid out for me. Matched with my favorite black skinny jeans and black boots, I had ditched the suit jacket that she had left for me also.

  “I’ll see how much of a wait we have. You girls go get yourself a seat.” Carl wore a suit looking very smart, but he always did. His job in some high rise building 90 miles away kept him working late and often not coming home until well into the night. Engineering was more than just a job to Carl. It was a passion.

  The black plastic chairs that we sat on were warm, and I was grateful for not wearing the suit jacket. We sat in silence watching people make their way across the lobby as they were called for each case. My eyes darted to the door every time I heard a creak. Each time I heard it, my heart would leap at anyone with Jared’s features. Dark brown eyes, sallow skin. Long black hair always tied at the nape of his neck. Even at thirteen, he had the strong features that told you when he got older, he would be very handsome – all the girls seemed to notice him, but he never paid them any attention.

  Carl had sat back down fifteen minutes ago, sitting on my left while Evelyn stayed on my right. Both of them leaned slightly into me while focusing on the door too. It seemed as if they were as nervous as I was at seeing Jared. They had never met him. Evelyn had tried to find out what had happened to him, but no one would give her any information. So today would give me some closure. I would finally know what happened to him.

  My pulse spiked, and my stomach twisted with nausea, as a small man with balding hair and glasses called us forward. I shuffled like a zombie, walking but not feeling the floor under my feet. It was like my brain had short-circuited. If not for the support of Carl and Evelyn on either side of me, I wouldn’t have made it to the man. His spotty skin was stretched across a broad face, and as he spoke, the large gap between his teeth became my focus. He spoke with no interest at all, but his words tightened around my throat and my heart. “The case has been postponed until a later date.”

  “May I ask why?” Evelyn spoke, asking the question that I couldn’t. The man glanced past us. “Jason McEvery?” he called before looking back at us. “One of the witnesses recently passed away.” He said it like one of them had slept in.

  Leaning away from the man, Evelyn clutched my hand.

  “Who?” my voice squeaked, and I swallowed. “Who?” I asked again. The man shook his head, took a quick glance past us once more before returning his attention back to us.

  “I’m not sure.”

  “Could you find out, please? Our daughter was friends with those children.” Carl had taken a step forward, towering over the man. Carl had never been violent in all the time I knew him but seeing him angry for me, and his use of the word daughter had sent a weakness to my knees.

  The shuffling of pages got my attention as I waited on the name.

  Don’t let it be Jared. Please God, anyone but Jared.

  “Nelson … I don’t see a surname.” My lips parted, and the dryness in my mouth had me releasing Evelyn’s hand and getting out my bottle of water. Jared’s okay.

  “I’m sorry for your loss,” the man spoke once again with no emotion. “You’ll get a new date in the mail.” He departed with a nod of his bald head, and we left the building in a strange haze, which seemed to cling to everything. Every face I passed, I searched for brown eyes. But Jared wasn’t there. He never showed up.

  CHAPTER TWO

  It had been three days since the original date of the court case, three days of numbness. I had built up all my hopes of seeing Jared and finding closure. But now everything was left wide open. My chest tightened as I thought of Nelson and I wondered yet again how he had died. No one would give us any information about him. I wanted to attend his funeral, but without a second name and his location, it wasn’t possible. My stomach churned at the thought that if it had been Jared, I don’t know how I would have handled it.

  The clang of Evelyn’s knife on the white porcelain plate drew me back to the breakfast bar. My eyes darted to Carl’s empty chair. He was staying in New York over the weekend. I pushed my cereal around my bowl. Evelyn’s soft touch on my arm had my gaze jumping to hers. “He’ll be back soon.” My face blazed. Was I that transparent?

  I got anxious when one of them wasn’t around, and irrational fear showed up telling me this perfect life that I had f
ound myself in, wouldn’t last forever. Evelyn told me it was normal, and it would fade. But it hadn’t.

  “I know. I was just thinking about work,” I lied, shoveling a spoon full into my mouth. I chewed on it like it was a bushtucker trial. Evelyn’s smile tugged at her mouth.

  “Layla, it's okay to worry about Carl. Honestly, he loves it.” She rolled her eyes dramatically. “It would break his heart if he thought we weren’t pining over him.” Her words and batting eyelids had me smiling back at her.

  “There’s that smile,” she said, while gently stroking my cheek before tipping me on the nose. “You better get ready for work. You don’t want to be late for your first day.” I quickly checked my phone. Yep, I was going to be late if I didn’t leave soon.

  My locker at work was tiny, only able to hold my one and only handbag. Carl had purchased it for my sixteenth birthday. I had known the cost of the purse and had insisted on Carl taking it back. He just looked at me with such a broad smile, as if the notion of returning the bag was ridiculous.

  Closing the locker door, I turned to the waiting girl, whose name tag read Ashley. Her tawny skin was flawless, as was her high ponytail, which was long and black. Everyone seemed to be able to achieve that look except me. With eyes not quite green or brown focused on me intently, I shuffled my feet, feeling self-aware. What did she see when she looked at me?

  A tall, thin, pale girl who was staring at her far too long?

  “So, follow me." Her accent sounded Hispanic, which made sense with her features. She turned on her heel, reminding me of a ballerina. Her frame was not really suited to that, though, as she was all curves. “I’ll show you where we eat.” I followed Ashley to a modest room that held a small table that shone from a recent cleaning. The two chairs were on either side of it, while a counter ran half the length of the room, giving a home to a microwave, a kettle, and a small mini fridge.